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Down with Alice

Gets me so hot I could scream, Alice Cooper, who has come here with a five foot boa constrictor and plans to be as big as Elvis. "We like to cause riots when we play. We use people's symbolism back at them. Snakes and whips and chickens and sexual ambiguity. We are what rock and roll is about. There's Jill on the phone. Who's Jill? The blonde. Tell her I'm not here. The snake is being introduced to the mouse that is her dinner. She only eats once a week. Watch her kill the mouse. It's a chance in a lifetime. We don't like British beer, come on baby, eat the mouse. Innocently the mouse is bouncing on his new snakeskin buddy. THere's the mouse, over there, stupid. The mouse is confused now, it must be like living L.A. The earthquakes. 300 last year. A lot of fifteen year old kids on acid. It's too much for them. They flip-out, the rest area is like a disaster. Pyscho-drama. Take it or leave it all in. Sitting in a graveyard. So much to see and look at. They find their parents hate us. My parents hate Alice Cooper, I think I'll go put eye makeup on. Anti-heroic endeavour. Say anything bad about Alice Cooper and they start fights, this is the kind of people you need with you. We always wanted to go on stage in asbestos suits with flame throwers and destroy the whole theatre. They can go home and grope with whoever they want to grope with. There is a lot in common between hangings and rock and roll concerts. Oswald shot on TV. I can't stand doctor shows. Look, look the mouse is dead.

(Originially published in the International Times #116, November 4-18th, 1971)