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Alice Cooper's School Daze

Remember, O brudders, those good old days in high school when you dreamed that someday you'd be in a longhaired rock 'n' roll band just like the Beatles and the girls'd be drooling all over you? Or maybe you're in high school right now, and you look at certain boa-flashing phenoms of our time and think, "If those faggots can do it, so can I!"

Take heart, bubbas; you're right.

No wastedome reading this magazine could possibly be a bigger dork than the three pictured above in Senior Class shots from their 1966 high school annual. And no, they're not the editors of CREEM; they're members of one of the highest riding raunch bands in the world, depicted in their current state of diz-ed out togetherness at the bottom of the page. That's also Alice (nee Vince) and Dennis with the arrows nuzzling their noggins when they were the stars of the Cortez High track team (the two-mile in 10:15), and onstage with Glenn and obscure confrere in their debut performance as the Earwigs at a Cortez talent show in the spring of 1964. They hit the deck in Beatie wigs, lettermen's jackets and sunglasses, and somehow inveigled a group of honeys into storming the stage during their performance of "She Loves You," even though the only one who knew how to play his instrument was Glen.

But even the fact that the tourney was won by a "tall kid in a blue suit" playing Sarasate's "Zigeunerweisen" on violin didn't stop the boys. So all you future superstars out there take heart — you couldn't possibly have farther to go than these three wimps. (Photos courtesy of William S. Thomas.)